Tag: drinking beer

Chasing That Vitamin D

Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

The sun came out today and it was magnificent. Actually the sun has been out for about a month but it was also a massive fifteen degrees which makes it almost feel like you’re somewhere exotic. Having spent years chasing the sun a younger version of me would have scoffed at my excitement but a younger version of me hadn’t just spent the whole winter in this bizarre, dark and wet land. This undoubtedly plays it’s part and can be compared to that time when I lived in Ibiza and it rained for the first time in six months. I felt unadulterated joy and happiness, similar I imagine to a farmer in the Sudan. Actually a little less because I wasn’t starving, in the poorest country in Africa and relying on that rain to survive so it literally wasn’t the same, but I can say with certainty it was somewhere between there and how I would feel if it started raining now.

The moment I realised I was experiencing a form of happiness was then I was sitting in my car, the fifteen degrees needed a little boost. I could feel the sun shining on my arm and after a while I could feel the heat building, I was cooking a little and I felt the vitamin D coursing through my body. It was the strangest sensation but I could feel the joy emanating from that spot. It was at this moment that I realised I was less content about being here and not somewhere warm than I suggested about a week ago. Don’t get me wrong nothing has fundamentally changed but I definitely started craving just hanging out of the beach, drinking some beer, eating some food, napping, the typical things people do. It was at this point I started imagining I could happily visit Costa Rica of all places. I have heard talk of it previously so this wasn’t entirely out of the blue but it was definitely a nice little fantasy that managed to take me away from the present for a bit. Interestingly enough it was when the sun came out that I wanted to leave and not throughout the whole of the winter. Our minds are confusing little pests sometimes.

I wonder what summer is going to be like here. I’m in a little touristy area beside the beach and arguably it’s what I’m after just not quite the foreign version I’m used to. My friend was horrified I was drinking beer on the beach the other day as apparently it’s illegal. I suggested he need to sort his life out. He said the same to me. Costa Rica it is not but when I imagine people stuck in blocks of flats in big cities right now I realise once again how bloody lucky I am and how in truth I don’t long for anything other than what I’ve managed to find myself. I forget to see what surrounds me sometimes. We all do. I don’t beat myself up over it, it’s just good to remember and notice sometimes. South Sudan it is not. In fact, arguably it is somewhere between there and well, anywhere. At least it’s somewhere.

Burning Stuff

Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

There can be something enjoyable about the more primitive pursuits. I have a few pallets of old stuff made of paper than can’t be thrown away and needs to be destroyed. Nothing dodgy of course, it’s just better to destroy some things. We have been trying to think of a good way of doing this without buying a shredder and it just dawned on me that I can build a big fire in the woods behind my house and spend a good few hours burning things and drinking beer. The drinking beer part is probably not the factor integral to the primitive pleasures but for sure there is a lot to be said for making a big fire and just burning stuff. I accept this could be because I grew up in the countryside and there is always stuff to burn, it just feels natural. We had an open fire and then a wood burner in the house, raked up leaves needed burning, old branches cut down and so on. There’s always something to burn and I have so many fond memories of standing outside with either one of my parents trying to control this huge bonfire, failing to avoid the smoke that seems to follow you and risking third degree burns just to push a branch into a slightly better burning position. I’m genuinely excited about the prospect of this big fire.

For those not familiar with Scotland they needn’t worry about me burning down the forest. I could make a fire and not bother clearly any old foliage around it, cover it in petrol, leave it and come back hours later, and the only danger will be that it has gone out. We don’t get forest fires where I am, the constant risk of rain renders everything inflammable. For those familiar with the dangers to hedgehogs and other hibernating animals then don’t worry I am clearly aware of this as a thing and will check any piles of branches and leaves nearby or where I burn. No hedgehog will die on my watch.

As I said though there is a real pleasure in burning stuff. Obviously from the parents stuff above there is an emotive connection. There is the warmth from the fire which makes caveman me feel safe. There is the need to destroy and out of that the necessity to understand and observe the cycle of destruction and creation as the ash fertilises the forest. There is the satisfaction of ticking something off the list of things that have been getting in my way for a long time too. And let’s be honest there’s the excuse to stand around and stare at the flames while drinking beer which feeds a need to drink beer and stand around staring at things. Why we don’t make more fires I really don’t know, there clearly are no downsides to it what so ever.