dog poo – Observations and Misunderstandings

Another Piece Another Poo

22/05/2020 Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

I mention sometimes why I write this every single. These are usually days when I’m struggling to think of something to say. Today I shall do the same, but not necessarily because I’m lost for words. I decided back in about October or November to write a piece on this blog every single day for a year. I didn’t post anything for the first month to make sure I was serious. It also gave me the chance to drop out without anyone knowing anything in the worst case scenario. Were I to look back I imagine there were some shocking early pieces but then I imagine they’re also spread throughout this whole blog. Sometimes I go through the motions, sometimes I think I’m a genius and others a pretentious arse. But that is inevitable because really what is there to say for four to five hundred, and sometimes more, words each and every day.

If I really wanted to make this thing some kind of success I know I should focus on one particular topic or one approach to different topics. But I don’t, not really. We all want adulation and some kind of confirmation that our wildest desires are right but really I just want to write something everyday. Maybe when I complete this thing I can bask in whatever warm glowing feeling the moment provides. Anything else I can worry about then but first and foremost I probably have about half a year remaining.

In the meantime, if anyone remembers something I wrote the other day about getting told off in the supermarket; in it I mentioned the local Facebook group that were doing their best to create the impression that this is a comedy village. One post that started out with photographic evidence of dog poo and led to revelations over the discovery of the human variety, may enjoy the news that we’re not alone in suffering such faeces trauma. It appears according to this story here that there has been some kind of attack on local seaside communities. Just imagine how exciting their local group is right now. It is incredibly tempting to send the BBC a link to the now defunct group chat, it would be the talk of the village for six months at least if we made national news. But I won’t. Even though I want to.

So that’s that. Another day in the life of someone who feels the need to share something with you daily. One more day done. I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.

A Bollocking In The Supermarket

18/05/2020 Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

I was involved in a minor incident in the supermarket yesterday. Nothing overly exciting but I got shouted at for trying to walk passed someone. The suggestion being that I wasn’t following the two metre / two chevron conveyor belt suggested system. I was on the phone at the time and just obliviously walking through the supermarket as I always do. This is the little Co-op on the corner opposite my flat and while some big supermarkets are strict with rules they’re never busy enough to do so. I was caught so unawares I didn’t have a clue what was going on at first and it took me a few seconds to realise what she was talking about. She marched off shouting about how ridiculous it was and I shouted back to her that yes it was ridiculous. I could have come up with something quicker and wittier but I still wasn’t completely sure what was going on. In the end it probably sounded a little on par with “I know you are but what am I”.

It’s a tricky one because even though I had no idea what was going on I still had a split second awareness that I couldn’t really tell her she was being dick because I was breaking some rules and she was clearly terrified and nervous walking around the shop which is not uncommon in this present situation. It’s just nobody likes being shouted at and had I not had that split second understanding of what she was talking about she may have been told where to go.

There is also a little back story to this though which may shed more light. I joined the local Facebook group about a month ago to advertise the pizza takeaway and we started following it as it was a fascinating read. Anyone familiar with the series The League Of Gentleman or just small insular village life will understand. There was the dog poo incident, photographic evidence provided, which was without a hint of humour or irony followed up by the human poo story. Usually tourists were blamed for this type of thing, as they were for making the high street over crowded too. As is inevitable with this type of mindset, fear of virus diseased tourists became inevitable. This is a village heavily dependent on tourism and the vitriol was ignorant and shameful. Last week there was talk of handing out wristbands to locals and barring tourists from entering the supermarket. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the need not to be spreading this virus, and that the majority are not this idiotic but there were enough voices for it to snowball out of control. The admins finally had enough and recognising the damage being done have deleted the local group page.

This is the present climate in the village. As much as I try though I can’t feel anger for her. Like I said nobody enjoys being shouted at, but this just shows how scared people are. Some levels of fear are credible and some not. I don’t know her so I shouldn’t cast judgment. I’m ruled as much by my ignorance as everyone else. Things like this crisis and this extreme situation we’ve found ourselves in are scary. I know I was scared and sometimes still am. I was back in the co-op today and while I agree with the two metre distancing, I think the one way system in supermarkets is stupid and does nothing but improve things on the cosmetic level. I was now cautious about passing anyone though. I may argue whether it was warranted but my bollocking seems to have done something, credible or not. Don’t worry I’ll return to my old rampaging ways in a day or two.

The Countryside In Quarantine

11/04/2020 Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

Another beautiful sunny day outside. How much I would have enjoyed spending Easter up north in Scotland somewhere. Whenever anyone has every asked me about the homeland I’ve always suggested April, May too but it usually rains more in May. It seems so trivial to be desiring nature and complaining about being deprived of it when people are dying. Don’t get me wrong I’m not about to suggest we should all start embracing nature and rural communities. I am originally from a rural community and I’m aware these people are not overly keen on city folk at the best of times let alone when they’re bringing virus’ with them. One of my childhood neighbours is currently bang in the middle of lambing season, well actually more towards the end probably, but just imagine one of them had caught it. Who knows what they would have done. That lamb chop has to come from somewhere. The other issues if a lack of local GPs and the only real hospital in the area is over half an hour away from my parents and while it’s a decent size it wouldn’t be capable of dealing with a local epidemic. I’m never one for pandering to official advice and while I have no real issue with people sitting in the park, I do with them moving around the country spreading this virus.

On the other hand I was looking at the local Facebook group for the village I’m in currently and someone had posted a photo of a camper van complaining about people coming to visit. It’s a tricky one here because this little village by the sea would be nothing without tourism which many people seem to have forgotten in their outrage. There were a few outraged comments before someone finally popped up and informed everyone it was a local guy who lived three doors down from him. It’s always a wonderful moment when outrage gets put back in it’s place. The post was deleted but subsequently replaced by a post replete with photos, complaining about dog poo in the park. So city folk, we clearly have enough to deal with already in these places. Perish the thought if Doris had stood in that, think of the outrage.

There was another post which drew my attention though and it was a meme for how the government was paying you to sit in your garden, drink beer and have a nice time, or something along those lines. So with all this talk complaining about people going into nature, it is important to raise awareness of all those without gardens, or fields, or front drives, or anywhere they can go outside without being accosted by some angry do gooder or some policeman with ticket book in hand. Can you imagine being stuck on the twelfth floor of a tower block, or in a one bedroom apartment, or in a flat share with flatmates you don’t like, or even in an abusive relationship. Nothing is ever black and white, lockdown is not the same for everyone and this virus is not the great leveller is has been described as. So share a thought for these people when you criticise others getting a little sunshine in the park or going for a walk. Just don’t walk too far into the countryside is all.