Tag: confused

To Understand Or Not To Understand

Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

Everyday, rules on the coronavirus seem to change. They are now discussing closing pubs in September when schools go back. I assume this is with the intention of balancing the dangers posed from both pubs and schools being open and slowing down any potential infection rate. I understand a certain amount of logic in that but it does seem to fly in the face of previous statements on there being no danger to schools opening up. If my memory is right teachers unions were blasted and shamed when they suggested that re-opening schools might increase the risk of infection and endanger teachers. Boris, his media mouthpieces and his puppet Sir Keir all seemed to be in agreement in dismissing the fears of teachers and now in a round about way they seem to be admitting these fears are in fact well founded. I wonder whether they will retract their previous statements.

There really is no way to follow what is going on properly though. There are some parts of the country going into gentle lockdowns, or ‘putting the brakes on’ as Boris suggested. They’re not really just putting the brakes on though if they’re re-introducing elements of lockdown, that suggests they’re also then going in reverse. Does that mean in other parts of the country that are not applying the metaphorical brakes that everything is fine and they can carry on or should they start to gentle apply them to prevent the necessity of slamming the foot down. The thing is I really don’t know. Ultimately I’m not an expert, very few people in this country and around the world genuinely are. That would presumably be ‘the scientists’ who by now have developed mythological status and who once ran the government according to a government trying to deflect criticism of itself and pass on any blame. It becomes hard to accept that decisions made weren’t political when blatantly they were. I want to believe there is no ulterior motive to all of this but it’s hard sometimes.

And then the rumours are that they’ll be expecting another full on lockdown in November and that it’s now not old people in danger but twenty to forty year olds. Why that age range all of a sudden? Does that suggest the virus has morphed slightly into something else, and if so does that mean the vaccine that if I’m not mistaken we’ve pre-ordered a rather large amount of will need to morph too. And if younger people are now in danger from it evolving should they not be discussing this a bit more. Everyday it feels like we hear something new but all that ever happens is we end up with more questions than answers. Nobody has a clue and those in authority on all sides only seem to focus on their own self-interests which frustrates and angers everyone further. No wonder people question and reject what would ordinarily be acceptable ideas. Will we ever get real answer and clarity. Will pigs fly as they say.

Incidentally, I picked out an old scarf I never imagined I would be wearing in the summer and have started tying it around my face in a way I never dreamt possible when going into shops. I’m still slightly sceptical about a few things and confused about others but am I another fool? I doubt I’ve ever not been.

A Manipulated Mass

Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

It is very hard in this day and age to know what is true and what isn’t. The internet is arguably the fount of all knowledge, and when we’re not looking at pictures of cats and stalking ex-partners we are quite simply blessed with the opportunity to discover – or to google which is a disturbing example of the evolution of language – the answer to any question we may want to ask. The problem here is that it seems very easy to get a variety of answers to one question. On the one hand that is great, difference of opinion will further debate and understanding within and of society. On the other though you have powerful financial interests manipulating which arguments are most easily accessible, the only inevitability is that debate becomes inaccurate and corrupted. There are few long term positives of such things unless you are the one doing the corrupting.

While this is all seemingly quite obvious, what appears to be the outcome are articles using public opinion to validate the argument, angle or narrative they are attempting to push. For example if you want to push a news story about public perception of an issue, it is very simple to go on the idiots validator – Twitter – select a few tweets – cringe – and post them within your article as proof of your argument. While it may seem obvious that people will dismiss the arguments of morons or people who are clearly not experts in the field – a corruptible concept too – people for one psychological reason or another seem unconsciously more likely to agree with the article if they believe it to be the majority opinion.

I saw an article recently describing how the left have disowned George Orwell because it had come out that he gave the names of suspected communists to the British government in 1949. The article was backed up by a few angry tweets criticising and disavowing him from people who clearly missed the point and didn’t understand the background to why he may have done that. This was in The Independent too which is a left wing British newspaper but it was total bullshit being validated by total bullshit.

The same could be done on the news. When a segment presents interviews with three people in the street for example, we often see two or three with one opinion that supports the overall message and one who doesn’t, how do we know that they only ever interviewed them and not ten others. The point is the media is as corrupt and untrustworthy as the politicians have always been yet we take what they say at face value. With eighty-three percent of mainstream media in the UK owned by three corporations, they can pretty much convince anybody of anything with enough coverage. They can be corrupt and it doesn’t matter. We have vaults of information online but who really looks beyond supposedly trustworthy news sources such as the BBC, or their equivalent in other countries and cultures.

Ultimately we’re as much a pack animal as dogs and if we believe the majority think something we’re more likely to go with it to remain part of the group. If you have such an array of opinions all appearing to validate something it has never been so easy to convince people even when it is in your interests and actively against theirs. The internet is arguable the greatest invention since the printing press, and with such knowledge comes the opportunity for rebellion and sedition live never before. Unfortunately it also seems to bring rise to the polarising and manipulating of peoples the world over. It is though early days, the internet is but a baby in the long history of information. There is still time yet.

The Yin Yang Brewery

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The beer didn’t brew properly. It is unclear at which point it went wrong but certainly it didn’t carbonate although I doubt that was all. In two bottles I used honey instead of the sugar they provided and they nearly exploded when I opened them, although they still tasted like shit. It is possible that the beer wasn’t kept warm enough, the instructions that came with it suggested keeping it at 18-20 degrees but I found things online suggesting 20-22 degrees so that may have been an issue. I also didn’t properly use the little oxygen / carbon dioxide thing, which has a proper name that I can’t remember, but which you put in the little hole at the top of the fermenting barrel. There were no instructions on it with the brewing kit as a whole so I just put it in place but discovered halfway through the brewing process that it was supposed to have either distilled water or some spirit to help filter the air going in and out. I put whisky in it but it may have been too late. I did notice on about day two that something had happened with the fermentation process and it seemed like it had risen pretty high so maybe that thing without liquid was an issue. Saying that it did ferment I think because the barrel was full of yeasty dough like gunk at the bottom so something happened.

Clearly then it could have been many things but what I am left with now is this sickly liquid, not thick like syrup but it seems as if it would like to become so. The two bottles which I used honey as the sugar are now gone, one partly over the wall, sink and table top as I opened it and the rest in my belly. There was one bottle which seemed to carbonate slightly using the sugar they gave, that is also now drunk as is one of the sickly sugary bottles that didn’t work. I suspect then that the rest will be going straight down the drain which is a terrible shame but the inevitable conclusion to a failed attempt.

Is this the end of my beer making career, most likely not but that will probably be down to whether I view it as an obstacle in the road or an experience to learn more, which would ultimately make it a success. That then would be the lesson we could learn from every situation that doesn’t work out as we had initially thought and hoped it would. These moments are not failures, but opportunities, now you know more about what you are trying to achieve and yourself in the the process. What a wonderful opportunity failure is, why do we not see it for the balancing yin and yang that it is and as some bad negative thing. It will only ever be how we view it and that is the one thing we at least have control over.

Amor Fati

Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

Having just watched a six minute School of Life video on youtube about Nietzsche and his concept of Amor Fati I find myself slightly confused. Much of what I hear of Nietzsche confuses me, much of what I read of him I agree with but usually forget, and some of which I disagree with but suspect may actually be correct, just a little harsh for my sensitivities to accept. He seemed to be complicated and misunderstood, and I’m sure I remember him saying something along the lines of inferior minds will misunderstand him and terrible things will be done in his name. Certainly my mind is inferior to his or may I say different. I doubt I’ll be such a groundbreaking philosopher as he was, the man was arguably the best, or most significant. And how to define inferior, for at least I can talk to women. Yeah fuck you Nietzsche with your superior mind and your constant rejections. It’s the small victories which keep our egos believing. I remember working as an extra on Game of Thrones and seeing the actor who played the handsome hero John Snow wearing platform shoes and having to stand on a box to make him appear slightly taller, my tall man ego won that skirmish. Unfortunately I may have been the only one playing.

Amor Fati means a love of ones fate and it has distasteful fatalist overtones, which I don’t necessarily feel comfortable believing or accepting. We may debatably live in a mildly predetermined world but the future only exists as much as the present allows. The premise of Amor Fati is that you love what has already passed or that you at least accept it. A refusal to regret what has gone before and not look back, this he believes to be a virtue. Perhaps this is him refusing to accept the hardships of his life, the rejections, the mental illnesses, and on a hypothetical note had his life been wonderful and jolly these ideas may never have come to him. In that case, for creating the environment to have these ideas, all that went before him had to happen. What is not to love about that. Believing in determinism or fatalism is not a requisite of acceptance. While we are all guilty of looking back longingly or regretfully, how we deal with adversity is what is of most importance. There is always something to learn from every moment if we so choose, the good or the bad, and how lucky we are to have adversity in our lives to give us that opportunity for development. If that is to love ones fate then amor fati me.