Tag: conditioning

Normal Is Another World

Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

It was just recently the one year anniversary of the massacre of three Mormon women and six of their children in Mexico. Their cars ambushed in the hills near their home at La Mora close to the US border. Caught up in local Cartel violence; the exact reasons and culprits are still unknown. They will likely never get real answers. It was a brutal event which understandably brought international attention and shock and just for a second it opened up a community to the eyes of the world.

With over seven billion people on earth there are over seven billion different ways of being raised to understand life and the world around. Mormons can be ridiculed for it, but they offer an example of another way of life. With my experience of growing up, understanding how people like these Mormons live their lives is not always easy. To begin with we view them through the narrow prism of our own conditioning and view their actions as if they thought as we do. But why would they, having grown up in a Mormon community in the north of Mexico, their experience in the large part is beyond my comprehension. Saying that having Anglo-European origins, they likely won’t be as far removed as we might first think.

I look at the women and struggle to understand how they could be happy with a husband who also has other wives. The young women growing up and ultimately being prepared for a life of baby making. The two women discussed in the BBC article have over one hundred children and grandchildren in total. That is simply remarkable. Or at least it’s remarkable for someone who comes from a country which will likely start to experience falling birth rates in the near future. The understanding of these women also comes from the experience of women with a very different attitude to sharing their men.

This isn’t to say all cultures are right in all their own ways and we need to respect people in their cultural sensitivities. If a culture is abusive of someone within it, then that is still wrong. It’s being able to identify the grey areas between what is abuse and what is simply misinterpretation because of your own cultural understanding of the world. There are plenty of examples throughout history which suggest we have at times got it very wrong. I look at the huge group of children in the pictures and think what a lovely childhood they must have growing up together, it’s just a shame it’s tinged with God and all that that entails. Many run away from Mormonism or don’t continue it’s practises, but someone growing up in that world will likely have a different perspective of God’s influence and all their brothers and sisters. Normal is always normal in our own eyes.

We can be critical too of people to don’t reject these worlds they grew up in. Unable to understand why they don’t walk away from what seems so obvious. With such sentiment all we do is miss the irony that we are unable to walk away from the more detrimental and destructive aspects of our own societies and ways of life. There are many and we vary in levels of obliviousness towards them. I can imagine a Mormon from this rural community finding all sorts of faults with the behaviour of the average city dwelling northern European.

This all simply comes from imagining growing up not as me but as a kid in this community. What a completely different understanding of the world, or of home they must have. Then imagine someone from Asia or Africa, or even southern Europe. It’s just important to remember sometimes that what we think isn’t necessarily the only way of thinking. How we experience a moment is not the only way of experiencing it. Normal is not always normal in others eyes after all.

The Habitual Self-Evolution

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Now it’s not that I’m not enjoying this writing challenge that I set myself and thought others might like inflicted upon them, but when I finally decided to check to see when the last day would be and discovered it not in early October or possibly even late September, instead mid November, my heart sunk a little. There was a little glimmer of hope in my mind that I had less than two months left and it turned out I have a full three. As I said it’s not that I’m not enjoying it and I know for certain I’m getting a lot from it, but I’ve almost forgotten what it’s like to not have a day in which there isn’t something at the back of my mind reminding me I still have to sit down and write something. It does feel like my one daily chore and as I write that I realise how lucky I am to have only one real chore. It’s not cool to blow ones own trumpet but for such an undisciplined person it has been a remarkable show of discipline. If only it was possible to transport that into other parts of my life.

It’s also quite easy though let’s be honest. To write four times a week but on any particular day or even at any frequency within the week would probably be more of a challenge than knowing it’s a daily routine of sitting down and doing something. When something has to be done daily there is a lack of opportunity for free thought and potential excuses. If I know I don’t necessarily have to do something today as I still have tomorrow to do it creates a different kind of challenge altogether. Discipline with choice or discipline without. I know myself and it may be a struggle. They do say, whoever ‘they’ are, that if you can do something for a whole year you will create enough of a habit to be able to maintain consistency and practice. I’ll now have a real example to use of whether I believe there to be any truth in that.

My heart sunk then when I discovered I still have a quarter of a year to go. It sunk despite knowing I enjoy and appreciate the benefits of doing this. This isn’t about really refining any styles, although I hope I will have done without realising. I’ll read from the beginning one day and see if my writing evolved over the time. It is about creating the habit of doing something regularly. I know I repeat myself a lot, or assume I do, but certainly I see a huge importance in understanding, observing and changing habit where necessary. So much of our lives are defined by habit. Arguably our actions and potentially even characters are just a series of habits formed from birth. We can say we have both good and bad habits and there would be validity in such a statement but I would like to explore whether it’s possible to challenge all habits no matter how they’re viewed in my mind. Can we be habit free? If habits are character defining then the answer is probably no but it would certainly be fun trying to find out. In the meantime this is simply one more piece closer to a new and hopefully long term habit. I share this with you, and pretend sometimes it’s for you, but let’s be honest I’m just using you all in my quest for some kind of self-evolution.

Don’t Taste The Wasp Twice

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We as a species have an inbuilt response to new things, we fear them. There is a practical reason for that and it is rational; new is unknown and unknown could mean danger. As a species we have managed to survive, adapt and evolve to the point we’re at in our evolutionary cycle. I don’t doubt one reason for our success so far has been down to instinctively following that practical approach mentioned above. Is it instinctive though? When we are young children we try to touch or eat anything new, it appears we sense next to no danger in anything, yet as adults we have become cautious if not neurotically fearful. That would suggest we are taught to fear new and unknown things but then puppies and adult dogs mirror human growth fear patterns too. Perhaps puppies learn new can mean danger because sometimes they experience the pain of discovering new things, like the taste of a wasp, or a dogs parenting is just not something obvious to my untrained eyes. Can we then take that further and use it to explain why we are so weary of new sources of information, or even new information that may contradict our previously held beliefs.

I suppose it is probably quite a straightforward idea, we distrust new sources because they are unknown and we haven’t built up a relationship of trust with them. We reject new information because our current beliefs are known to us and with them we have so far survived to this point in life. With them we have safety and life, potentially this unknown new information may lead to danger and the taking away of either our safety or in the extreme our life. There is also the issue of narrative to take into consideration, what doesn’t fit our narrative we are likely to dismiss but I’ll not go down that avenue this time.

I was sent a link to a video on YouTube by a friend who has a differing set of ideals and beliefs about how best we should approach the world than I do. I rarely bother engaging him in discussion anymore because neither of us come close to seeing the others perspective and I always end it feeling exhausted and frustrated that I’ve wasted an evening arguing with a brick wall. When I received this video I assumed immediately it would relate to one of his points previously made, which it did, and in my mind I had already rejected it before even contemplating watching it. My initial response was to see it was a YouTube video and dismiss it as worthless. There are many useful videos on YouTube and I have taught myself how to do all sorts of things through them, but videos of a political or social nature are quite often just a pile of tosh. I had already rejected the point because of the source platform. I decided to watch it a little, not the full one hour because I have better things to do, and did some research on the speaker and his organisation. Seemingly they are of a different persuasion to me but I still watched and tried to listen to the message. After ten disagreeable minutes I gave up because I found him frustrating, it appears you can’t argue with a pre-recorded person. I do understand why angry people comment now but I still refuse to get involved in that game. Ultimately my point is that I like to think I gave the speaker the opportunity and I listened with a clear mind but it’s not easy when you already think the platform the information is on and the source of the information are unreliable and bullshit.

Absorbing new information is clearly an incredibly challenging task. We struggle to absorb anything that is new because it is unknown and potentially dangerous, and we struggle to accept anything contradictory to our present set of beliefs as it challenges what has so far kept us safe. The YouTube example above is an easy one to dismiss because the contents and the platform are like the Daily Star of video journalism but sometimes we get contradictory information from credible sources and this can be hard to accept and equally dismiss.

The more I delve into these things the more I’m starting to realise just how hard, if not impossible, it is being some kind of discerning, moral and decent person. Here I am, just like yesterday back to the fallible human. Is failure what makes us human, or perhaps the ability to recognise and improve on our past failures. It is okay to be fallible. It is unavoidable clearly, but is it only acceptable if and when we try and avoid repeat failure. Being conscious of our previous failures, accepting that they are inevitable and pushing on in the search of perfection, or at the very least an acceptable success. Don’t try and taste the wasp twice, it’s all so simple now, if only I had realised that earlier.

Li Shizhen & Political Medicine

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Specific dates from the past are always hard to verify and quite often when recording somebody’s date of birth they are either inaccurate or a year or period of years is given. It was finally decided in the 1960s during Chairman Mao’s Cultural Revolution that Li Shizhen was born on the Third of July 1518. Up until this period he had been a relatively little known historical figure but with the rise of Communist China his status was elevated to one of national hero. His most famous and greatest achievement was to compile his Compendium of Materia Medica which was a scientific book based upon Chinese herbology. It took him twenty seven years and while he completed it prior to his death in 1593, it was not published until afterwards by his remaining children. It received varying amounts of attention upon release but nothing comparative to it’s fame post politicising. There are no known images of his true likeness and all have been created during the last half century in China. Films have been made about him, books have been written about him and the myth of the barefoot doctor going from village to village curing the people has been born.

Many of the cures he wrote about form the basis of what is now known as traditional Chinese Medicine. There are many examples of herbology being incredibly effective at helping people lead a long and healthy life. More traditional based remedies quite often look holistically at the body comparative to modern medicines which go straight to the pain. Both of these approaches have their benefits and this isn’t to specifically bash traditional or modern medicines. For every corrupt pharmaceutical rep pushing drugs which will never actually cure anyone but merely create dependence, you have traditional practitioners pushing shark fin soup and rhino horn. Rhino horn ground down will not make you strong and virulent. Shark fin soup will not do whatever medicinal benefits it’s proponents suggest it will. Shark fin soup was popularised and made fashionable during the Ming dynasty by the Tianqi Emperor who ruled from 1620 to 1627 who had it served at royal banquets. It first appeared in Li Shizhen’s Compendium of Materia Medica.

Beautiful animals like tigers, rhinos and sharks are partly being pushed to the edge of extinction by the popularity of dishes containing them in modern day China. This is not an article damning the field entirely as there are proven benefits from some treatments, some being absorbed into more modern medicinal approaches. What it is though is a piece highlighting the utter absurdity that endangered animals are being massacred because of the ideological myths creating by a regime looking to maintain it’s grip on power. He is the barefoot doctor, the man of the people, the Chinese hero. People in China are not just eating powdered horn and fin soup because they believe it to do something, this is state sanctioned conditioning. There are no extra erections on show, merely the remains of prostrate butchered animals.

Mental Corruption

Hamar WilliamsLeave a comment

My plan yesterday had been to start talking about football and depending how it evolved, hopefully find myself on the topic of corruption. My brain however had a mind of it’s own and certainly was a long way from working. Today, has not been that different, my brain still has a mind of it’s own and I haven’t seen much evidence of it working.

It’s that time of year then when we all start to look at our lives and ask the difficult questions. I haven’t necessarily had a bad 2019, it’s been great in many ways but I’m ready for 2020 too, ready to see what it has to offer. I realised recently, or in the last six months I think, that worrying about how old I am and life passing me by is pointless. It stemmed from attempting to move into what could be considered the normal world and thinking that at my age I was ill equipped. In hindsight it’s clear now that the folly there was to mistake what equipment was required.

Of course these fears come from seeing how much stuff people are doing with their lives and while I know I’ve done some cool things, I know right now I could be doing more. I don’t like the idea that life is passing me by even when I know it’s not. I don’t want to be cheesy but ultimately it is all part of a process, and as long as you have a goal you’re on a journey, even if that journey is to merely achieve the goal of finding a goal to achieve. There are some podcast guys I listen to, specifically Dr Christopher Ryan for the sake of this point, who have achieved some known things in life and probably a lot of unknown things, as well as periods of doing fuck all, but he’s now in his late fifties and still evolving into something cool, achieving things along the way. I mention him not to idolise or replicate him but to highlight that really we get caught up so much with this idea of age and having limits of what it is we can and have to have achieved by certain ages. It is interesting really just to see people still doing things at certain ages when societies and many of our peers tell us we can’t or should be doing something else. Saying that it is also double-edged as I met some memorable people traveling still, who had been been traveling too long, who I felt should have perhaps stopped and done something else by their age. If living the dream has now become ironic then you may have gone too far.

I still haven’t managed to talk about corruption but that is fine. You see I’ll get there, that is a point to achieve and everything relating to it or not is just part of the journey in reaching it. So tomorrow will be the last day of this decade, and who knows what the next will hold, but I’m excited for what it will, and that includes how I’m going to get there. Who knows, if I make it exciting enough there may even be a little corruption on the way.