Today then is a little horticultural update. An update on my failed venture into horticulturalism to be precise. Interestingly enough too on a side note, horticulturalism doesn’t appear to be a word which surprises me. If a horticulturalist is someone who practices or is learning gardening and plant management lets say, then if they believe in the theory of gardening as some kind of ideology or movement then surely it must be capable of being an ‘ism’. Surely horticulturalism could be a theoretical approach to fighting the slide into a climate catastrophe, a belief that gardening could save the world perhaps. It’s probably not a far fetched as it sounds depending how it’s worded.
I decided to use the power of the internet and there are suggestions it might just be a word. According to dictionary.com there is no such word but wiktionary.org – I know anything beginning with wik should be immediately dismissed but humour me – suggests it is a synonym of horticulturism, which dictionary.com also suggests isn’t a word, not that dictionary.com is necessarily the most respected of dictionary sources, and that it means ‘a small scale agricultural lifestyle’ which sounds about right. Interestingly apparently in psychology it is ‘the idea that people do not need explicit instruction from others in order to develop cognition, but can be nurtured to develop cognition individually’, in other words they can develop cognition in the same way a plant can grow or garden can develop.
I seem to have digressed massively to the point that this entire piece has little to do with the failed attempt at nurturing a few plants I was originally going to share. I have one chilli plant, one red skin pepper which is basically a chilli too and an aubergine plant. They were coming along well enough considering they have been living on the inside of a window ledge and not a garden but recently I discovered they had caught plant lice, more commonly known as aphids. These little fuckers multiplied and I could tell my poor babies were suffering to the point something needed to be done. When my rainbow chilli plant travelling companion in Australia got aphids I simply left it on the roof of my car most of the day and the ladybirds did their ravenous job but inside here is different. I read that you can wipe diluted washing up liquid on the leaves but I decided to attempt another method I read about instead. Apparently if you dilute vinegar you can spray it on the plants and the aphids will leave. It turns out all you do is burn the leaves, kill the flowers, weaken your plant and make your room stink of vinegar. As you can see from the picture it has been a resounding failure. I plan tomorrow to offer them up to my mother who has a garden in the countryside and who can hopefully nurture them back to life with the help of the local ladybirds. It is like the plant version of retreating to the countryside to convalesce. They need nursing. They need recovery. This will certainly be used as an example of something profound when this finds it’s way into the future theory of horiculturalism. Step as Marx and Friedman, there’s a new player in town and he’s armed with compost.
Observations and Misunderstandings 